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An honest cover letter


Hi! I'm Wes Lynn (she/her/hers). I'm a female Brazilian software engineer with over two decades of professional IT experience. I started out of boredom and curiosity by tearing apart my mother's computer, assembling it again, being grounded for it, and then being asked to help her connect to the internet. Got a job as a SysAdmin after trying to figure out how to install SNES emulators and discovering that I had a serious case of having Windows 98 First Edition and having to perform a clean OS install. Then I took a sabbatical year backpacking, riding my bike, eating junk food, getting fat and absorbing all that free content available at a dial of the 56k modem to get fluent in English while learning how to code, all by myself. Lately, I have taken great pleasure in working with employers of multiple sizes and nationalities worldwide as a professional jack-of-all-trades. 

I can do anything from basic: "How to connect to the company's VPN by reading the docs I wrote to you in a scheduled Zoom call" assignments. To deploy an entire multi-cloud, sexy, hybrid, mode 2, infrastructure as code triggered by a single PR merge. To develop beautiful responsive web apps with Ruby on Rails, Django, Golang, React, Angular, Kubernetes, HTML, CSS, Web3, Blockchain, and Svelte to help companies achieve Business Success (BS). I'm writing this letter because your job posting resonated with me. Honestly, I couldn't care less about the industry you're serving. But based on the research I've done. It looks like you are disrupting the field. And that you can safely pay for my expensive lifestyle. It is not that I don't care for the things you do. I just happen to know that, in the end, it is all about the people I'm serving. Good or bad, it doesn't matter. I just gotta help them out. I enjoy closely watching the positive impact that my work brings. That is why I like working with small companies such as yours.

Like my male hero, Ron Swanson, I'm a woman of many gifts. I'm a woodworker, a soccer player, a responsible pet and plant owner, a poet, an ultra-marathonist, a woman of strong beliefs and opinions, and a proud lesbian who doesn't look down on people with different sexual preferences. Unlike Ron, I'm not brave enough to work with public servants and politicians. Believe me, I tried. I had plenty of those opportunities while growing up in Brasília, Brazil's capital (No, it is not Rio nor São Paulo, common mistake). Instead, I decided to work for the private sector. But I rather work for a cool startup than for the owners of the government, those evil enterprise capitalists, the ones paying "all the taxes" so they can get bailed out when shit hits the fan while pursuing their dreamed BS.

BTW, that feature is not really complicated! We are all just a bunch of lazy motherfuckers that rather spend the next six months planning the perfect solution than coding the MVP in 4 weeks. 

The above is a direct quote from the email that fucked up the relationship with my former manager, the one who eventually made me quit my last job. That email leaked on the dark web, but that is not why I'm putting it here. I just believe I don't have to work for my life. That I have better things to do. Also, to be productive, I don't need to work 24/7. I know better where my money comes from. It is from all the BS I can provide with a few keystrokes! And based on the values I've seen on your company's website and your Glassdoor reviews, I strongly feel that you believe the same.

Feel free to check my GitHub profile to see all the code I gathered in my many hours of careful Stack Overflow content curation. Also, please visit my LinkedIn profile to look up the referrals from my previous employers and co-workers and how well I can use ChatGPT to write blog posts. Last, thank you in advance for revising my application. I'm ready to play a bigger role in my life and am confident that working for Ghost International Incorporated is the place to start.

Wes Lynn.